When I knew I was quitting my job I had a vision in my mind. A vision of how my life would be so awesome; so incredibly all about me. I would do things for my family, of course, but I would be so centered and in such a state of bliss that it would be a pleasure and a
privilege to serve them.
But I have seen reality, and reality is slightly different than I had pictured.
These are actual examples of the polar opposites I have experienced in the last 2 weeks.
Fantasy-- I pictured myself spending my days floating around in a gauzy gown and a golden halo, or at least in a fashionable cute outfit 4 sizes smaller than I wore on the last day of work.
Reality--Driving 80 miles per hour down the interstate in my pajama pants because I didn't get up early enough to change before driving the kids to school
Fantasy--Preparing nutritious meals from scratch, using my home-canned salsa, free range beef, and fresh homemade tortillas
Reality--freaking out when I see the flames in my oven caused by wayward
tator tots catching on fire while I am cooking frozen
pre-made Buffalo chicken strips 50 degrees hotter than the package says to because we are all starving and just want to eat.
Fantasy--Reading on my Kindle for hours,
cozied up with a soft warm blanket and a ice cold diet cherry Pepsi. I am wearing my fuzziest shirt and fluffiest socks. The weather is misty and slightly drizzly.
Reality--Having a melt down because it is 90 degrees outside and none of my
tshirts are clean. I am wearing a stained (actually bleached out) black
tshirt that I dug out of the dryer before it is dry. I don't know where my Kindle is because I haven't had time to read. I am sitting in my sons 1998 Pontiac with no air conditioning. The sunroof is letting the sun beat down on my head while I wait in the parking lot for the kids to get out of school.
Fantasy--My house is clean. It sparkles. The dishes are never in the sink. The floor never needs mopped. You can actually see the top of the dining room table, the coffee table, and the end table. I have so much time that I hang the kids' clothes in their closets.
Reality--Annie just asked me where her high school tshirt is. I told her I remember washing it. She asked if it was in the wash or in her room. I told her I didn't know, to just go look. I can see the tops of the tables because I made Clay carry all the crap to the basement so I wouldn't have to look at it.
Don't get me wrong. I really like the changes in myself and my family since I quit! I am so thankful that I have this time to recharge and look at where I want my life to go. I just find it interesting that reality doesn't listen to me very well. :)